It’s Like A GLP-1 For Your Phone

A moment to reflect

When asked, “When I think about my child’s experience growing up, I wish ______ had never been invented,” parents were clear.

In a recent Harris Poll of 1,013 parents, Porn, alcohol, and guns were ranked highest, along with many social media platforms.

As a cyclist, I was relieved to see bicycles ranked last at 9%, though I do question those parents. It proves that not everyone can be a fan, I guess.

This data supports the work of Jonathan Haidt, author of The Anxious Generation, my most gifted book of 2024. The New York Times today published a guest essay (We Don’t Have to Give In to the Smartphone) by Haidt and his colleagues about their research and advocacy for four essential norms to protect our children: delaying smartphone use, delaying social media use, establishing phone-free schools, and giving kids more free play and independence.

If I could be bold, I’d suggest a fifth norm: role modeling healthy digital use by adults

I loosely equate the smartphone to food. The analogy isn’t perfect, but if you extend some grace, here’s where it can work:

• Whole foods = mindful, purposeful tech use
• Junk food = mindless doom-scrolling, algorithm-chasing apps
• Overeating = too much screen time without limits or balance

Most of us want to eat better, but we still reach for the Cheeze-It, especially when we’re stressed (at least I do). The same goes for our phones. We want to be more present, but we struggle, especially with today’s chaos, with the phone’s constant “come hither” dopamine wink. It’s like a magnet.

The fifth norm is about building healthier habits and modeling digital wellness for our children and one another. After all, we are not immune to the harms of social media and constant connectivity and our kids, may not always listen to us, but they are watching what we are doing.

In my work, I often get asked about happiness. In the first third of my life, I chased it. I caught moments of it, but it always flew away. During my recovery, I discovered Viktor Frankl and a quote often attributed to him:

“Between stimulus and response, there’s a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

The practice of Pause Breathe Reflect is about lengthening this space because the key to happiness, from my study and experience, is discernment. In other words, it’s about the choices we make. They become better when we are less reactive.

Pausing and not immediately grabbing our phones challenges the notion that it’s better to be busy and occupied. It refuses the algorithmic call to be constantly distracted and always plugged in.

I love Haidt’s work and his passionate pursuit of establishing these norms. I’m the biggest proponent of his fourth norm, which encourages more free play for kids, something I appreciate from my childhood.

This norm, along with #5, goes upstream and can fundamentally shift how we use our phones, replacing screen time with something that brings us more joy.

Going analog or converting to flip phones can create viral news stories, but they’re not practical or scalable. However, we can change our relationship with our smartphones and the constant urge to be connected. We can find ways to place them down, get outside, and, for 91% of the population, ride our bikes.

Here’s my shameless plug:

Think about how much time and energy we spend on our hair, teeth, nails, and skin each year. Then, add all the other things we do to “look good” on the outside; it’s bananas.

The Pause Breathe Reflect App, featuring Microdose EQ (rated 4.9 on the App Store 🙌), helps you feel good from the inside out.

It gives you the power to lock and unlock distracting apps and websites, helping you spend less time on your phone while providing a relatable practice to create more space in your life. It’s like a GLP-1 for your phone.

Someone told me recently, “It’s annoying at first, but it really works!” She cracked me up with this. Others have share that it has helped them be less distracted while driving. They’re gifting it to their children for graduation, and whole teams (at least those on iPhones) are using it during meetings, so people actually pay attention, which is a novel idea. 😀

If you have Pause Breathe Reflect on your iPhone, you can set it up today by opening the app and following the prompts.

If you don’t have it yet, you can download it from the App Store and try it free for seven days. We’ll even plant a tree or remove ocean plastic when you do.

You’re future self will be happy you did.

Until next week, have fun storming the castle, but remember, you can’t use your phone there. It’s a phone-free castle.

Michael